


Is This What You Wanted

by wonderlandiscrumbling



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, No Man's Land, conversations before the end, light shipping, season five
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-01-15
Packaged: 2019-10-10 17:37:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17430461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderlandiscrumbling/pseuds/wonderlandiscrumbling
Summary: Ed can't help but not understand why Lee like so many others he knows feel as if they have to stay in this god forsaken city.





	Is This What You Wanted

Finally, the city looked the way that it had always felt. Buildings burned, people screamed, manic laughter filled the streets and Ed watched all of this from the rooftop of one of the apartments in Haven. He knew that he did not belong in this place, it was an open wound and he was a potential virus; his madness and his sins could spread like wildfire tearing the place to the ground. In his jacket pocket was a gold pocket watch he’d snatched from the apartment of an elderly woman, it did him no good to steal, there was no need for currency, but stealing was normalcy. He missed patterns and traditions, he missed guns aimed at faces and demands for cash that could buy him weapons or cars or more alcohol. 

“You do know Jim would lose his shit if he found you here.”

Ed smiled at the sound of the familiar voice. He continued to look out at the city feeling no need to turn around. “Hi Lee, good to see you too.”

He heard the clicking of her heels as she walked towards him soon, she stood at his side looking at the view. 

“Was this worth staying for?” He asked looking towards her. He noticed that her hair was now much shorter, just barely shoulder length. She looked worn and tired, full of regrets and traumas, something dark and unsettled in her eyes that told him the rumors were true and she’d been crossing a hard line she used to claim she’d never cross.

Killing wasn’t the solution, it only caused more problems she’d said to him once during a drunken conversation between bitter friends. It seemed that changed.

She smiled, “What would we have even done outside of here?” She asked looking at him.

He couldn’t help but laugh at the question. The possibilities were endless or so it seemed that way to him.

“Seriously? Lee we could have done anything, leave the state, or the country for that matter. Gone our separate ways, lead new lives. Be happy for once.” 

He felt exasperated by her, in all the time he’d known her, the version of her that survived Gotham city he’d been lost as to how she thought they had to stay in this place. She wasn’t the only one though; Oswald, Gordon, Wayne, all of them seemed to fall into the same mindset as if the city itself were alive and keeping them here.

“Would you have left if I didn’t go with you?” She asked ignoring his question, his argument as to why all of them should have left when given the chance.

He paused feeling sudden guilt mixed with confusion, he looked away from her and back towards the burning backdrop of their home. “No” he whispered, his response automatic and so honest that it caused a pain in his chest.

He shivered when she reached out tugging at the ends of his shagging hair. “Care to tell me why you haven’t cut this yet?” She asked, a teasing tone to her voice. Ed glared at her, lightly swatting her hand away.

“Why does everybody insist that I cut my hair and besides I’ve been a bit too busy to take the time for things like that.”

He had his black outs to worry about, he was terrified of sleep. The last time he’d fallen asleep he’d come to find out he’d nearly started a damn gang war with Penguin.

She moved closer to him pressing herself against him, he swallowed hard feeling his heart thudding in his chest as he looked down at her. She leaned up her face near his, red painted lips just barely brushing against his, he itched to place a hand against her hip, but kept his hands at his sides. She kissed him quickly before pulling back, she smiled coyly as she held up the gold pocket watch he’d stolen.

“Too busy for a hair cut but not too busy to steal from a senile old man?” She asked, eyebrow raised as she looked at him.

He grabbed for the watch, she sidestepped him, he stumbled nearly falling. “A man does have to keep up with his hobby you realize.”

He watched as she placed the watch into her own pocket. “Ed, we have, if we are remotely lucky, another month until we may all die. Whether that’s due to starvation, death by psychopathic clowns, or death by God knows what else. Maybe we should spend this time being more honest.”

“Honest…Okay so if we’re being honest.” He approached her this time placing his hand on her hip. “I really did love you, despite what you or Gordon or half the city thinks I do love. I had hoped if you left here that you could lead a good life and I had no plans on being a part of that life, I used to root for you to have a good life, to be away from here. I also truly do apologize for stabbing you but you kind of did stab me first.” He said before kissing her forehead.

He walked past her, he plucked the watch from her pocket as he passed her by. He didn’t want to argue or wait for her response, he knew she still was struggling with morality, gray areas, and what made one bad or good. If she was bad or if she was good. He wasn’t sure he wanted to spend his final days struggling, he had many other things to do.


End file.
